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Posts Tagged ‘gerard butler’


It has been a while since we visited our favourite futuristic, dysfunctional tropical planet, Lagartha. Mostly because I was being a cheap bastard and waiting for Hammond’s third KOP book in this delightful futuristic noir trilogy to show up on my library shelves. Alas, it didn’t and so I had to do the unthinkable: yes, I went out and bought it (gasp). But fear not, it was worth the 4 quid from Amazon. And so with all the niceties out of the way, let’s get on with it. Shall we?

Killer finds our favourite corrupt cop, Juno Mozambe, on the other side of the law as an average citizen, in the wake of his murdered partner, Paul, the former corrupt chief of the Koba Office of Police (KOP). To make things worse, the murder was engineered by the new corrupt chief, Emil Mota, that now resides over KOP and uses the institution for his own personal gain. Sounds like a certain real-life administration. At this point Juno decides to get back into the protection racket whilst teaming up with a rag-tag team of loyal officers and his former partner Maggie Orzo (possibly the only clean-cut police officer in the entire planet … yes, it is that corrupt) in plan to get revenge on Mota. But this time it isn’t business as usual, for Juno’s ulterior motive is to get Mota out of the way in order to put Maggie in the position, for he feels that Maggie is the only one that can turn the system around for the … better. Yes, our favourite, corrupt, meat-eating, alpha-male, protagonist actually wants to do something that is actually virtuous and decent. But this is Lagartha (sort of rhymes with Sparta) and the only that that gets kicked down that bottomless dark hole as it gets showered by Gerard Butler’s spittle is decency and civility. So when Juno decides to call Mota out and challenge his rule, what happens is the unexpected as Juno realizes that his mouth may have written a check that his body (literally) might not be able to cash. And it doesn’t take much long in the book for the vicious, gory violence that is characteristic of Lagartha to rear its head. And it is quick and vicious. And pretty boy Mota turns out to be anything but. In 2798 (yes, it is way into the future) and Lagartha is about to heat up and we’re not talking about the planet’s vicious humidity. Life is cheaper than Lagarthan sewage and the depravity keeps setting the bar at newer heights. And as his rag-tag crew starts perishing, in the most vicious ways, Juno is caught in a cat-and-mouse that is breathless and terrifying. There are of course all the usual seedy delicacies: kinky, rich offworlder wanks, twisted warlords, and yes, even more corrupt, psychotic police officers. And what would a futuristic detective noir be without strange 28th century tech: cybernetic-enhanced vaginas (yes, you read right and this is not a spelling error), tattoos that can be turned on and off and even be animated, and anthromorphic enhancements that can turn people into things like werewolves. Yes, Lagartha is strange, vicious, tropical planet where if the humidity doesn’t kill you there is a good chance that inhabitants will … possibly just because they can and for some other silly reason.
Hammond’s third KOP book, in what feels like a trilogy, keeps up the tempo from the other two and then some. It grabs you by the throat, viciously taunts and teases you as peer anxiously around each page as you would around the corners of a large mansion that has a rampaging maniac, and hurtles you in break-neck speed (busted brakes and all) towards a blood stained conclusion. Sorry, but this … is … Lagartha.

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